Halo Amedika !

If only I had a fortune cookie for this morning, the night before…

If you want to mass text your old phone address book at 6am, about your return to the cuntry after 9 months when you’re still jet-lagging 48 hours (and counting), be prepared for the 30+ replies and 2 missed calls within the hour.

It would suck to be you if you do not have your Zypraxa handy.

I will be home in less than 12 hours. I don’t know how to feel. For as long as the plane sinks in altitude while the overhead telly flashes random information that brings me nothing but nostalgia, my heart sinks along with it. I reminisce what happened, before and after I flew to the land of real opportunities, trying to take it all in, letting it sink in.

Still trying.

38005 feet, it said. 11518km went by.

I recall musing about my pre-departure some months ago. Relationships were the main theme, particulary the ones I had with my family and the cuntry. What used to feel like motivations to constrict my freedom and individuality now feels like excuses to make amends. The BERSIH rally, something like the vendetta I wish for Malaysia the very moment I watched V for Vendetta, actualized with the kind of media attention I think it deserved better. Not too long ago, over the phone, Mum told me to do whatever that makes me happy, sans our usual altercations. Even if it means sans my formal education too.

My romantic life. Over the month of August, at least six former flames attempted to make peace, some with hopes to rekindle past fires. I think I said something along the lines of “Dream on”.

As for my life in North America, well, let’s just say that nobody who has lived most of their life in the same cuntry would realize how narrow-minded they really are until they’re in frequent contact with someone of foreign culture. Many someone-s for that matter. Try dating a mixed batch at the same time too. For nobody can assume that they’re truly liberal until they’ve met their match. Also, it was interesting to put the American-Malaysian politics and social norms in perspective. Just yesterday, during the last makan session Malaysian gathering, after speaking to some Malaysians who have been around town for at least “half a decade,” I was reminded of the refreshing change practically all of us have undergone ever since we left the Southeast Asian counterpart of this melting pot of international culture.

Though, all in all, to compare the Malaysian drama I’ve endured with its North American counterpart’s worth of bohemia, my stand remains: I was not in the wrong place nor was the United States a better place for me to live in. I was merely in the right places to see what’s wrong with the mindsets many apart from me have been pre-conditioned with.

The best part of returning home? The food I think I got my best friend back; the best friend from high school. Not to mention the newfound realization of the amount of true blue friends I really have, especially in desperate times of need. How I was pleasantly surprised.

And all of this was made possible after my stay in that psychiatric unit, over the break in Spring, the week of my 21st birthday, my coming of the very legal age.

Irony, c’est la vie. Which reminds me: I’m taking French100 this Fall. Wish my procrastination preseverance luck for this summer and beyond.

Of friends and family and overdue spa vacations, no amount of wailing babies can spoil my mood right now. Not even the Korean brat behind my window seat.

Char kuay teow, ayam kambing bek!

.
.

P.S. This Sony VAIO is very nice and white and complementary before my next flight of Seoul Incheon Airport, South Korea!

Once in a while, it’s good to catch up with home.

-

The Sun (From Malaysia Today)

12th Sept, 2007: Expel those who burn flag

In the Dewan Rakyat today, B.Suresh Ram reported that the torching of the Jalur Gemilang ignited the MPs’ passion on the need to respect the national flag and punish those who insult and desecrate it.

Barisan Nasional (BN) MPs were particularly worked up over the incident and asked that the stiffest possible punishment be meted to the perpetrators.

Datuk Md. Alwi Che Ahmad (BN-Ketereh), interjecting in the debate on Budget 2008 by Datuk Raja Ahmad Zainuddin Raja Omar (BN-Larut), asked whether the burning of the flag amounted to a rebellion (derhaka).

“The flag amounts to our nation. Burning the flag amounts to a rebellion,” he said.

Datuk Bung Mokhtar Radin (BN-Kinabatangan) said that in the past, he had talked about Wee Meng Chee over his action on the national anthem.

“Today, there is another Wee Meng Chee. We should expel (halau) such people from the country. Use any law available to expel them,” he said.

Mohd Said Yusof (BN-Jasin) said the act showed such people did not care about the dignity of the country when they committed such acts.

Raja Ahmad Zainuddin said such people, regardless of their political affiliation, had committed an act of rebellion by torching the national flag.

“The authorities should investigate … they should find the mastermind behind the incident … irrespective of the political affiliation or the community they come from,” he said.

Datuk Mohamad Aziz said: “Warriors would hold up the flag at whatever cost. If the right hand is incapacitated (putus), they hold it up with the left hand. But today the people have resorted to burning the flag,” he said, adding that people who committed such acts should be detained under the Internal security Act or other laws.

Lim Kit Siang (DAP-Ipoh Timur) interjected and sought to defend Wee Meng Chee.

“Wee Meng Chee did not burn the Jalur Gemilang. Instead he took along the flag when he went to study overseas. He also took along the flag when he won a competition,” he said.

Mohamad retorted: “This is not about whether he is a Chinese or a Malay. He was abusive of the country.”

“But that is not fair. That is not right. He did not burn the flag,” Lim said, amid an exchange of shouting from MPs.

Deputy Speaker Datuk Dr Yusof Yaacob, after several minutes, managed to bring the house under control after Datuk Ismail Abd Muttalib (BN-Maran) said: “The pensioners in the villages had never rebelled (derhaka). It was the youths in the town who burned the flags. They should get out of Malaysia.”

Raja Ahmad Zainuddin, however, appealed to his peers not to jump the gun and let the authorities conduct their investigations. “Lets wait for the investigations. We want to know who is the mastermind (dalang).”

Salahuddin said: “Do not doubt our loyalty to the country. During our AGM, we raised the Malaysian flag too. BN MPs should listen to Raja Ahmad

Zainuddin and allow investigations to be concluded.”

-

Is it just me or did the government just became more retarded by the moment?

-

Comments
plc wrote:
2 clowns are talking c**k again!
12/09 10:53:34

Sudahlah tu wrote:
Sampai juga agenda ini …
Balik balik pakai modal ini dalam parlimen …
Wang gaji yang diterima dibayar balik dengan perbahasan tidak ada penghujungnya …
Inilah mental MP Malaysia yang bersidang untuk menghabiskan masa mereka sebab telah dipertanggungjawabkan dan diamanahkan.
Di luar Parlimen nanti , tutup satu mata …
Kalau U tak suka , U boleh keluar ..
12/09 11:51:38

abdullah wrote:
We have some of the most uneducated and worst-mannered MPs in our parliament. Bodowi, that really makes you stupid… Kesian.
12/09 12:08:46

rafidadah wrote:
kenapa ni?! semua mp free sangat ker?!
kenapa tak bincangkan binatang liar yg lepaskan tembakan ke arah orang ramai?!
adakah ni satu lagi diversity mata orang ramai supaya “terlupa” siapalah mangsa?! siapa yg berlaku kesalahan?! siapalah telah melanggar undang2?!
12/09 13:00:54

lunas oh lunaih wrote:
betul ke polis yang menembak tu tak pakai uniform? kenapa tak pakai ?
apa agenda tak pakai uniform.

MAYBE the one who burnt the flags is SB.or one of the mat rempit paid by who knows???

MAYBE HE BURNT the AMERICAN FLAG…haha
12/09 13:40:05

TianCi wrote:
Cannot burn flag but can squander the National Treasury!!! That is TREASON!!! Hang the people in KBS who are involved in the issues!!!
12/09 13:40:20

anakwatanKL wrote:
“In the Dewan Rakyat today, B.Suresh Ram reported that the torching of the Jalur Gemilang ignited the MPs’ passion on the need to respect the national flag and punish those who insult and desecrate it………
Datuk Bung Mokhtar Radin (BN-Kinabatangan) said that in the past, he had talked about Wee Meng Chee over his action on the national anthem.”

Excuse me, before you guys go on your shouting or ‘lynching’ spree, exercise thought on the actions of your fellow members in the dewan. One waved his keris which is a symbolic and respectable object earlier in the attempt to assert authority which only came out just as foolish, arrogant and unethical.

About Wee Meng Chee, he’s just a Malaysian student abroad who’s homesick, as per previous article, and does need to be guided or educated instead of being threatened or ridiculed.
12/09 14:59:53

rogue wrote:
Hello Bung & Az,

The Indons just burnt many of your Jalur Gemilang, where’s your warriors?
12/09 15:51:47

joeawk wrote:
Malaysians should respect the Malaysian flag and should not burn it. It is very disrespwectful. They should have burnt the BN or UMNO flag or perhaps thay have come to see UMNO as the govt and to get their fruatration out, they resorted to burning the Malaysian flag. Besides, it was just after merdeka and the flag is readily availanle.

BUT, that is that, not the most important.What about the crooks and assholes MPs and cabinet members, not excluding those in senior govt positions,especially those many crooks among the KSUs, who make pledges to carry out their roles and responsibilities honourable but which turn out otherwise? What do we make of them. UMNO and the govt is full of such asshole crooks.
12/09 16:11:51

mountain man wrote:
Punish those who burn flags, WHAT ABOUT those who squandered away millions like Dato Zakaria?
12/09 16:35:23

IbnAbdHalim wrote:
Malaysian parliament resembles the planet of the apes. Could digest what come out of it. Incompetent MPs talking about patriotism, and yet how patriotic are they?
Who torched the national flag? There’s a big question mark there. Could it be the SB? It’s always their tactics to paint a bad picture on the opposition.
12/09 18:22:53

IbnAbdHalim wrote:
typo: couln’t
12/09 18:23:39

temanmu wrote:
The Police is the govt lackey. They are in cahoots with the nation’s plunderers.

Just talk only…. investigate lah… “no further action” … kes tutup!
13/09 02:10:08

smalluncle wrote:
Burning of National Flag CERTAINLY is DERHAKA. Malaysia is a country, it cannot do wrong. If at all things are not right, its because people managing the country. So Please spare the flag.

Now, if buring of flag, composing Negarakuku must BUANG NEGARA, compare like to like, these people also need to be BUANG NEGARA, for they strip the country of its wealth, a consequence that can make the country BANKRUPT, or bring shame to Malaysia in the eye of the world. These peoples are:
* those guilty of all the mismanagement of peoples’ money as highlihted in the DG report
* Those responsible for “IMPROVE” our standing in the corruption index.
* those who are committed of crime trading pirate CDs and illegal trding of logs.
* those who disrespect the existnce of other races in a multi racial country “Malaysia” and want them Keluar
* those who do not behave like Good Malaysian be it in rally or in parlimen.
* those , those, those, aiyah, tired of typing lah, just read the articles in MT including the achieved articles lah.
NOW, that is bigger DERHAKA.

Ah,so, if we also BUANG these people, MALAYSIA will be the Shangrila of ASIA, if not the world.
13/09 23:09:46

-

MALAYSIA BOLEH!

Now, I’m more convinced than ever that Malaysia is not bodoh, it’s BN that is bodoh. Hence, it’s no longer “bodoland” for me, but “BNland“.

Same concept as “Bushland” for USA.

Seriously, Malaysia needs a vendetta to heal.

-

Random footnote: MY is the acronym for Malaysia.

(Author’s note: I know I’ve been MIA for a tad too long. I’m not done being MIA yet but since this is a Merdeka post, hence being in conjunction with Malaysia’s birthday is pretty urgent, methinks.

Originally meant for an international student newsletter. I’ll check whether this is of ISA’s interest or not, soon.

Meh.)

~

Birthday Wish

I can be prosecuted if this is published in my country.

Then again, it depends.

It depends on who is in control.

For nearly 50 years, that didn’t matter.

Some things are just……unlikely to change.

For now.

~

Many a time have I written on the sickening politics of this misguided land of Malaysia. From the constricting societal norms of the local Chinese culture to the pompous Islamic moral guardians.

Nobody is spared from judgment. Dogma is adapted for the power hungry and the insecure and it prevails above the law.

In Malaysia, the constitution contradicts, ambiguously so.

In Malaysia, rights have lost their meaning, for both humans and animals.

In Malaysia, most of her education doesn’t prepare you for the world outside its borders. At this rate, it will never.

The politicians wanted it that way.

I hate it.

~

Imagine waking up at birth to a place you’re taught to call home. For years, you thought it was home. Your parents worked there. Your siblings schooled there. Your friends found you there.

Everything was there. Your sense of belonging; your home.

At least, it was.

Until you grew into the age of reason. Slowly, through experience, the blissful veil of ignorance dropped with pity past your rose tinted shades and you see that fairy tales you were told don’t often have happy endings after all.

Especially when you’re not born a Malay; a Malaysian Muslim.

Whose special rights protect the majority of the country, not the minority.

~

To better illustrate my affection for the education of real life culture, nothing beats first hand observation. Coming from a city of world-renowned friendliness called Kuala Lumpur, I have been accustomed to sour-faced servers and stoic cashiers. People didn’t say hi unless they were your friends. You’d be suspected of snatch theft if you so much as smiled at them. You keep your thoughts to yourself unless you want to be seen as an arrogant prick.

Malaysia truly Asia, the tourism department promotes.

And ever since I’ve reached the American soil, I’ve discovered many smart and outspoken people. People who care more about honesty than saving face. Though some may be opinionated, they nonetheless enjoy discussions.

The creative arts is so rich here that it enriches the sciences here.

It shames me to know what my homeland has been robbed of. By her governors.

Courtesy has a great meaning here. Cars don’t race to ram you down. “Thank you”s and “welcome”s are rampant. So much so that “Hi, may I help you?” surprises me sometimes.

~

I was forewarned that Westerners place little value on sincerity. They say “Thank you” and “Welcome” for the sake of it. Hypocrisy, the warning seemed to imply.

Initially, upon my first few weeks here, I felt the same.

I met this local girl at a poster sale and she was talking about Fight Club the movie and she enthusiastically expressed how we should watch that movie together. Like totally.

Another local guy expressed how nice it was to meet me and that we should hang out sometimes and gave me his number.

Eventually, we parted like strangers once more. I have yet to hear from them.

For some time, I felt as if they lied.

Gradually, I learned that it’s not so much about hypocrisy but more about common decency. It’s like how people should be nice to one another in public. Keep your bad moods to yourself. Nobody deserves to be inflicted with your mood swings.

After all, people do talk about things for the fun of it. Nothing serious unless stated. When it comes to the issue of small talks, I think what these Westerners are actually doing is throwing ideas around. Like “Oh my god, we should totally get together sometime and try that Pop Tart!”…

…is just an idea.

And people, who aren’t accustomed to such open friendliness, might take offense from being too serious about relationships in general.

~

I remember the last time I felt that Americans in general were insincere. Now, after making new friends, I realize that it was mainly because I felt lonely myself. In this newfound land.

Any sort of great friendliness which felt intimate made me take more interest in that person, more than I would regard the usual stranger.

So, I think, it’s more about the issue of one’s self-esteem, more than the shallowness of anybody else.

~

Humans have always valued a sense of belonging. A sense of security, harmony, and peace.

Even the biggest misanthropist would admit that, deep down.

It’s only a matter of who, what, or where you want to belong to.

~

I think this stereotype of “Westerners being friendly but shallow/meaningless” is flawed. It’s more popular to regard the Westerners as such because they have healthier self-esteems than most Asians, in general, as the former has been cultivated to be more outspoken since young, whereas its Asian counterparts have always been cultivated to be more passive at its own expense.

~

Today marks the 50th year of Malaysia.

I don’t see how age represents maturity.

~

Happy Independence Day.